You morons are about to catch a real beatin'.
— The Scout
Crit-a-Cola, known in full as Bonk! Crit-a-Cola, is a secondary weapon for the Scout. It is a purple soda can manufactured by the Bonk! company, and sports the tagline 'Manliness guaranteed!'.
When the drink is ingested, it gives the Scout the ability to deal mini-crits for 8 seconds with any equipped weapon and increases speed by 25%. However, when consumed with the maximum speed of the Baby Face's Blaster, the movement speed only increases 2.5 units/second. Any damage taken while under the effect of Crit-a-Cola will be increased by 10%.
|Function times (in seconds)
||The user has increased movement speed by 25%,
and gives mini-crits. Damage taken is increased 10%.
|Values are approximate and determined by community testing.
As a crafting ingredient
|| Retire the Runner|
Kill a Scout while they are under the effect of Crit-a-Cola.
April 28, 2010 Patch
- The Crit-a-Cola was added to the game.
April 29, 2010 Patch (119th Update)
- The "Retire the Runner" achievement was changed to apply to this weapon.
- [Undocumented] The Crit-a-Cola was given its own texture to match the backpack icon.
May 12, 2010 Patch
- [Undocumented] Added crafting recipe for the Crit-a-Cola.
June 10, 2010 Patch (Mac Update)
- [Undocumented] The liquid spill from readying a can of Crit-a-Cola is now purple, instead of the green that Bonk! Atomic Punch uses.
December 17, 2010 Patch (Australian Christmas)
January 19, 2011 Patch
- Fixed switching to the melee weapon instead of using the last weapon setting after drinking.
January 24, 2011 Patch
March 15, 2011 Patch
- [Undocumented] The Crit-a-Cola was removed from the crafting blueprint for the Buffalo Steak Sandvich.
April 20, 2011 Patch
- Fixed a bug that allowed the Crit-a-Cola to be used repeatedly with no cooldown.
June 3, 2011 Patch
- Added community contributed response rules to the Crit-a-Cola.
August 18, 2011 Patch
- [Undocumented] Fixed the particle effect on the draw animation for the Crit-a-Cola not showing in censored version.
September 15, 2011 Patch
- Fixed Natascha's bullets preventing Scouts from using Crit-a-Cola.
June 27, 2012 Patch (Pyromania Update)
- Changed attributes:
- Added +25% increased movement speed while active.
- Increased duration from 6 to 8 seconds.
July 10, 2013 Patch
- Changed attributes:
- Removed Damage taken mini-crits.
- Added Damage taken increased 25%.
November 12, 2013 Patch
December 6, 2013 Patch
- [Undocumented] Added Strange quality.
December 20, 2013 Patch
- Changed attribute:
- Reduced damage taken increased from 25% to 10%.
- As with Bonk! Atomic Punch, the Crit-a-Cola can uses a pull-tab opening mechanism; first invented in 1956, it was phased out with the current opening mechanism in the late 1970s.
- Crit-a-Cola was designed and created one day before its release. Upon its release, it had the same texture and particle effects as Bonk! Atomic Punch.
- The weapon's name is a play on popular soft-drink brand name Coca-Cola.
- The labels for Bonk! Atomic Punch and Crit-a-Cola list the ingredients as water, radiation, and sugar. Several lines of random letters also appear on the label itself.
- ↑ PC Gamer: 'Valve on the future of TF2', retrieved 2010-10-19