Difference between revisions of "User:Dereko/Last Will"

From Team Fortress Wiki
Jump to: navigation, search
m (maybe?)
m (draft)
 
Line 1: Line 1:
{{ambox|type=notice|contents=Despite being a subpage of [[User:Dereko]], this page was created as draft, which is open for everyone to edit.}}
+
{{Navbox
{{Infobox|title=The Last Will and Testament of Zepheniah Mann|image=The Last Will and Testament of Zepheniah Mann aka Issue 97.jpg|imagewidth= 220px}}
+
| name          = Background Nav
{{quotation|Zepheniah Mann|To my layabout, brain defective sons, Blutarch and Redmond, I leave the greatest curse of all - partnership. What land I have purchased in this new world is to be split evenly between you both. You have wasted your lives bickering over nothing, and so I leave you dimwits something of consequence over which to feud. }}
+
| state        = {{{state|uncollapsed}}}
 +
| liststyle    = padding: 0.25em;
 +
| bodystyle    = border: 1px solid #AAA;
 +
| titlestyle    = background: #F3A957; color: black;
 +
| groupstyle    = text-align: center
  
'''''The Last Will and Testament of Zepheniah Mann''''' is [[storyline]] content revealed in stages through [[hidden pages]] published in [[Patches|major updates]].
+
| title  = [[Storyline|Background]]
 
+
| group1 = [[Non-player characters|NPC]]
Nominally, the Last Will and Testament was originally presented as the background for the game's first [[Halloween event]], [[Harvest Event|first Haunted map]], and [[Ghost|first Halloween Monster]]. However, in the course of his [[w:Bequest|bequests]], [[NPC#Zepheniah Mann|Zepheniah Mann]] describes his reasons for relocating to the [[Badlands (Region)|Badlands]] and his unpleasant experiences there. Particularly, Zepheniah expressed his displeasure with his twin sons; and, so, he evenly divided the lands he purchased in the Americas between the two, establishing the basis for their conflict in the Badlands, known in the context of the ''[[Team Fortress 2]]'' game as the [[Storyline#Gravel_War|Gravel War]].
+
| list1  = [[Administrator]]<!--
 
+
  -->{{md}}[[Miss Pauling]]<!--
Moreover, Zepheniah made bequests to other particular persons, thereby introducing them to the storyline. To [[Non-player characters#Barnabus Hale|Barnabas Hale]] he granted Mann & Sons Munitions Concern, which eventually became [[Mann Co.]] with Barnabas Hale's grandson [[Saxton Hale]] as CEO. To one [[Administrator#Elizabeth|Elizabeth]], he gave the [[w:Residuary estate|residue of his estate]] – Elisabeth is widely considered to be represented in the [https://www.teamfortress.com/pumpkinpatch/family_portrait/ ''Family Portrait''] as the woman sitting next to Zepheniah, bearing a passing fair resemblance to the [[Administrator|Administrator]].
+
  -->{{md}}[[Saxton Hale]]<!--
 
+
  -->{{md}}[[Merasmus]]<!--
In the [https://www.teamfortress.com/pumpkinpatch/the_last_will_and_testament_of_Zepheniah_Mann/ original publication], certain lines of testament are obscured by "[[w:sand|fool's gravel]]", which, when revealed in a later [https://www.teamfortress.com/mannwil hidden page] as part of the [[ARG#Mann_vs._Machine|ARG]] for the [[Mann vs. Machine (update)|Mann vs. Machine Update]], introduced a surprise character scheming to acquire the true wealth of Mann Co.. Zephaniah's "miracle" gravel is interpreted as [[Australium]], which is placed under Elizabeth's protection.
+
  -->{{md}}[[Bombinomicon (character)|Bombinomicon]]<!--
 
+
  -->{{md}}[[Horseless Headless Horsemann]]<!--
== Synopsis ==
+
  -->{{md}}[[MONOCULUS]]
* Zepheniah Mann vows to haunt [[Harvest Event|the earth]] as [[Ghost|a horrifying poltergeist]].
+
| group2 = [[Comics]]
* Zepheniah Mann spent his entire fortune speculating on gravel in New Mexico, but found only sand.
+
| list2  = [[The Insult That Made a "Jarate Master" Out of Sniper{{if lang}}|{{common string|the insult that made a "jarate master" out of sniper
* He declares that he suffered many medical conditions; somewhat fantastically named, several are real conditions, but using 19<sup>th</sup> Century diagnoses, such as [[w:Persistent Müllerian duct syndrome|superfluous uterus]], which is often a [[:File:Bloodbrothers8 zh-hans.jpg|hereditary condition]].
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[WAR! Comic{{if lang}}|{{common string|war! comic
* The residue of his estate not given to the "twins" or to Barnabas Hale is left to Elizabeth.
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[A Visual History{{if lang}}|{{common string|a visual history
* He gives Mann & Sons Munitions Concern (Mann Co.) to Barnabas Hale.
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[Loose Canon{{if lang}}|{{common string|loose canon
* His properties in the [[w:Americas|Americas]] are evenly split between his two "brain defective" sons, [[RED|Redmond]] and [[BLU|Blutarch]].
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[Bidwell's Big Plan{{if lang}}|{{common string|bidwell's big plan
* ''[Hidden for three years until the Mann vs. Machine Update]''
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[Meet the Director{{if lang}}|{{common string|meet the director
** Zephaniah places his cache of "miracle" gravel under the sworn protection of Elizabeth.
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[Grordbort's Crash{{if lang}}|{{common string|grordbort's crash
** Zephaniah mentions a third "weakling son", [[Non-player characters#Gray Mann|Gray]], who is after the "miracle" gravel.
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[Bombinomicon (comic){{if lang}}|{{common string|bombinomicon
 
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[True Meaning{{if lang}}|{{common string|true meaning
== Updates and references ==
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[A Smissmas Story{{if lang}}|{{common string|a smissmas story
{{See also|Hidden pages|ARG}}
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[Blood Brothers{{if lang}}|{{common string|blood brothers
; 2009
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[A Fate Worse Than Chess{{if lang}}|{{common string|a fate worse than chess
* In the [https://www.teamfortress.com/pumpkinpatch/ update page] of [[Haunted Hallowe'en Special]], the last will was introduced inside a hidden page, with some text covered by sand.
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[Doom-Mates{{if lang}}|{{common string|doom-mates
** There is also a secret link inside the former page, which leads to another hidden page displaying a fragmentary portrait of Mann family.
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[Shadow Boxers{{if lang}}|{{common string|shadow boxers
** The family portrait was later seen in the first ''TF2'' storyline comic ''[[WAR! Comic|WAR!]]'', kept by the [[Administrator]] on her control panel.
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[Death of a Salesbot{{if lang}}|{{common string|death of a salesbot
 
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[Ring of Fired{{if lang}}|{{common string|ring of fired
; 2010
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[Grave Matters{{if lang}}|{{common string|grave matters
* In the comic ''[[Loose Canon]]'', the last will was quoted, with the scene of Zepheniah's death being portrayed.
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[Unhappy Returns{{if lang}}|{{common string|unhappy returns
* In the [https://www.teamfortress.com/screamfortress/ update page] of [[Scream Fortress Update]], another half of the portrait was revealed in a hidden page.
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[A Cold Day in Hell{{if lang}}|{{common string|a cold day in hell
 
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[Catch-Up{{if lang}}|{{common string|catch up
; 2012
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[Blood in the Water{{if lang}}|{{common string|blood in the water
* During an [[ARG#Mann vs. Machine|ARG event]] before the [[Mann vs. Machine (update)|Mann vs. Machine Update]], the full version of the last will was revealed in a hidden page.
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[Blood Money{{if lang}}|{{common string|blood money
** Despite not being connected to the last will directly, a [[:File:Blog Birth Certificate.jpg|birth certificate]] was also revealed in the event, mentioning Gray for the first time, as well as naming the midwife as Patience Meriwether and relating the sons to the [[Non-player_characters#Charles_Darling|Darling family]] through their mother.
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[The Contract{{if lang}}|{{common string|the contract
 
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[Old Wounds{{if lang}}|{{common string|old wounds
; 2014
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[Gargoyles & Gravel{{if lang}}|{{common string|gargoyles & gravel
* In the comic ''[[Catch-Up]]'', the story of Mann family, as written in the last will, was retrospected by [[Saxton Hale]].
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[The Showdown{{if lang}}|{{common string|the showdown
 
+
  }}]]{{md}}[[The Naked and the Dead{{if lang}}|{{common string|the naked and the dead
== Transcript ==
+
  }}]]
{| class="wikitable collapsible collapsed" width="100%"
+
| group3 = [[List of companies|Companies]]
! class="header" | Transcript
+
| list3  = [[Mann Co.]]<!--
|-
+
  -->{{md}}[[TF Industries]]<!--
| I, Zephaniah Mann being of sound mind, do hereby vow to haunt the earth as a horrifying poltergeist, until such time as I have quenched my all-consuming thirst for vengeance against the world, and especially against my dunderhead sons.
+
  -->{{md}}[[RED]]<!--
 
+
  -->{{md}}[[BLU]]<!--
If it takes a brave man to admit he is in error, then surely a man willing to admit both of his sons are stumble-bum muttonheads is twice as brave. It was they who convinced me to spend the entirety of my sizeable fortune purchasing land in the unclaimed frontier of the Americas, in the hope of expanding our weapons concern to the uncolonized westernmost regions. Many tales did they whisper in my too credulous ears, of gravel as far as the eye can see, for any man with strong back and iron spirit to harness. Long did I dream of transforming these virgin lands and its vast holes into the world's most majestic and profitable pits of gravel. But when at last we arrived, we found only "fool's gravel"- my nitwit sons had purchased a continent-sized parcel of sand! It is here in this wind-swept desert hell that I fear I shall breathe my last.
+
  -->{{md}}[[Lecture Valley]]<!--
 
+
  -->{{md}}[[Valve]]
Since moving from my Cambridgeshire estate to the untamed frontier I have contracted putrid fever, bilious fever, blackwater fever, green fever, spotted fever - even womb fever, as a complication from a serious bout of superfluous uterus. On our sailing trip to the new world I contracted white plague, marasmus, sweating sickness, deplumatious tumors of the eyelids, pleurisy, membranous croup and scarlet rash; during the drive west I contracted brain itch, stomatitus, and blood poisoning; since settling our estate I have contracted falling sickness, walking sickness, stationary sickness, shingles, jaundiced spine and skull bloat. I contracted scrivener's palsy in the writing of this last will & testament. Possessing no paper in this godforsaken frontier, I have penned this on my own skin, which has sloughed off in quantity since contracting impetigo.
+
| group4 = Miscellaneous
 
+
| list4  = [[Australium]]<!--
To the foul-smelling, uneducated simpletons of the untamed Americas, I leave only this curse - as weapons have caused my downfall, so will I engineer the downfall of any soul who puts one to use near my restless grave. Shoot over my bones, and I shall visit upon you a haunting the likes of which you have never seen. To my dearest maidservant Elizabeth I leave the rest and residue of my estate - including all deeds, accounts, debts public and private - my tobacco plantation - and what remains of the fortune my addle-pated sons have squandered. Find the gravel that I was unable to find! Honor me by placing it inside a pit!
+
  -->{{md}}[[Life Extender Machine]]<!--
 
+
  -->{{md}}[[Teufort (city)|Teufort]]<!--
To my faithful aide and tracker, Barnabas Hale of the savage Australians, I divest compleat control of the Mann & Sons Munitions Concern. You procured the poppy flowers required for the medicines that gave me succor from the pains of my many warring ailments. It has been pleasant to not shriek myself to sleep.
+
  -->{{md}}[[Badlands (region)|Badlands]] ([[Map of Badlands]])<!--
 
+
  -->{{md}}[[The Last Will and Testament of Zepheniah Mann]]<!--
To my layabout, brain defective sons, Blutarch and Redmond, I leave the greatest curse of all - partnership. What land I have purchased in this new world is to be split evenly between you both. You have wasted your lives bickering over nothing, and so I leave you dimwits something of consequence over which to feud.
+
  -->{{md}}[[Hidden pages]]<!--
 
+
  -->{{md}}[[ARG]]
<div style="border: 1px solid #045FB4; margin: 2px auto; padding: 5px 5px">
+
}}
<span style="font-weight:bold; color:#045FB4;">This paragraph was originally obscured by sand</span><br>
 
Lastly, to most trusted Elizabeth I leave the entirety of my "miracle" gravel cache, uncovered with Barnabas during a trip to Terra Australis. My weakling son Gray resurfaced last year and has threatened to blackmail me for it. I give the gravel to you and swear you to utmost secrecy in its keeping.
 
</div>
 
 
 
God and His angels will have to drag me screaming to Heaven. I do not want to die! Damn you all to Hell!
 
 
 
Zephaniah Mann
 
|}
 
 
 
== Gallery ==
 
<gallery>
 
File:The Last Will and Testament of Zepheniah Mann aka Issue 97.jpg|The last will<br>(partially obscured)
 
File:ZepheniahMannLastWill.jpg|The last will<br>(full version)
 
File:Familyportrait.jpg|The Mann family portrait<br>(left half)
 
File:Portrait.JPG|The Mann family portrait<br>(two pieces)
 
Blog Birth Certificate.jpg|The birth certificate
 
</gallery>
 
 
 
== See also ==
 
* [[Storyline]]
 
* [[Non-player characters]]
 
 
 
[[Category:Background]]
 

Latest revision as of 06:58, 27 June 2021