The Hat Describing Contest is a contest that was announced on August 24, 2010.
Following criticism that previous TF2 contests shunned players without a more than average skill in computer modelling, the TF2 team announced this contest in the blog post with an aim to reach the majority of the community, albeit those registered on the forums. The object of the contest is to allow members of the community to give descriptions to the various in game hats.
Guidelines and Deadline
The deadline for the Hat Describing Contest was August 27, 2010. Submissions were posted in their proper threads on the Steam Users' Forums.
Submission Rules
- Give a brief, interesting description of the item in 75 words or less.
- You must be the sole author of the description and the material must be original to you.
- The winning descriptions for each item will be determined by the TF2 team and may be used in game.
Prizes
There are no prizes per se, besides the winner's entries being added to the game.
Winners
Scout
| TheTwoTonHammer
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You'll be batting a thousand (skulls in) when you don this red piece of plastic!
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| PrO-bOy
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When drinking one radioactive beverage at a time is not enough.
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| Doreauxgard42
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Extra! Extra! You're frickin' dead!
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| AndyAML
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Everyone knows that speed is a Scout’s best friend. Why weigh yourself down with bulky hats when you can break the sound barrier without them?
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| spam_word
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Straight outta control point.
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| Sketch56
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You'd have to be a jughead not to realize this cap is the pinnacle of fashion for the discerning youth.
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Soldier
| Man Of Faith ™
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This hat does not in any way, shape or form, promote smoking or gambling.
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| DrMelon
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I kicked your ass so hard it went back in time and got me this VIKING HAT.
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| cypherx82
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Protects cranium from bullets and shrapnel. Also heats soup.
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| Lamech
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Given to those few, brave soldiers whom stood guard valiantly, without sleep, nourishment, or a social life.
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| f3doraman
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A haiku for war. To defeat one's enemies. Honor the crocket.
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| peregrine7
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This hat is a handy replacement for profanity-filled ranting when you don't feel like shouting yourself hoarse.
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Pyro
| Colonelcool
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It doesn't matter how much people respect you when they're on fire.
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| crushilista
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At least he's still telling you to burn things.
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| ASpieboy
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Pyro wears this in tribute to the many firefighters who have perished trying to quell his flames.
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| JJ10DMAN
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The most distinguished tape-on fire-retardant facial hair available, for the discerning gentleman of conflagration.
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Demoman
| icenine0
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Three sharp corners mean one sharp hat. Don't poke your eye out.
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Heavy
| Potatoblight
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This hat was made of bear hands. That bear was killed with bare hands.
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| FarazParsa
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Because when you're the toughest Mother Hubbard in the fort, nobody's criticizing your fashion sense.
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| Silentman
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Your opponents will be all shook up when they see these sweet shades and coif.
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Engineer
| ravn0s
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For Engineers with bright ideas.
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| drewhead118
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Though it looks like a simple ten-gallon hat, this modern feat of engineering actually contains more moving parts than a level 2 Sentry Gun.
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| FarazParsa
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Sometimes you just need a little less hat.
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| Shapechanger
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Mock the sun with streaks of flame as the UV rays bounce harmlessly away from your eyeballs.
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| foxtrot261
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It gets difficult trying to calculate the total external applied torque to a body's rotational motion through its moment of momentum vector while the distracting sounds of gunfire and death are all around you. Build a better, safer machine with the silence of the Safe'n'Sound!
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Medic
| This_Is_Not_Spy
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A relic from one war brought into another. Your enemy will get the point.
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| CptObvious
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We can't pronounce it either.
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| AgentJAK
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Scrub in... things are about to get messy.
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| Esquilax
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While lacking the cachet of other hats, the Gatsby nonetheless possesses its own sartorial elegance. Its understated and affable charm appeals to everyone, whether playing a round of golf with friends or performing non-elective surgery with a well-polished Bonesaw.
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Sniper
| Limeaide
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Any old sap can pull teeth from a dead crocodile. It takes a man to pull teeth from a live one.
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| Nineaxis
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A polite, efficient hat to wear when killing everyone you meet.
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| Magi Kavin
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Only a master of Jarate earns the right to wear this once-white bandanna, stained yellow from the rigors of a harsh training regimen.
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| Jinbei
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His bullet was close. I lost my hat. My bullet was closer. He lost his head.
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| G.I.R.
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Perfect for exploring the outback and the inside of people's heads.
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| Reclaimer077
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Gone Snipin'.
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Spy
| Kenori
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This smooth, suave, silk-lined beauty can turn any amateur backstabber into a handsome rogue.
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| caeonosphere
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For when you wish your head was a little taller, but just as round on top.
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| Codo
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You wouldn't mind if I read this top secret document with my beard, would you?
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| Shapechanger
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They say justice is blind. What they don't tell you is that justice is also invisible, and also less interested in justice than murder.
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All class
| AndyAML
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Though some would stop at nothing to achieve hats, you remained resolute and incorruptible in your quest for head decorations. For that, you have been rewarded.
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| Esquilax
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Elegant simplicity and old-world charm combined with the heady aromas of mould and grave dust.
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| Duffren
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Brown paper never looked so mildly disturbing.
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| Calvary
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Left 4 You.
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| Fredrik1ST
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Because a Gentleman is not one without one.
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| Nekopawed
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For the Gentleman who believes even his hat deserves a hat.
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| Coconuts
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A-ha-ha! You are as PRESUMPTUOUS as you are POOR and IRISH. Tarnish notte the majesty of my TOWER of HATS.
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| crushilista
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Even though you were late to the party, you were still the life of it.
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| Optimus357
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Sure, some may have been doing it longer. But you've proven few can do it better.
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| SappinMySentry
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Display this on your chest proudly, Soldier. Each time you kill someone, they'll know they weren't the first.
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| NB820
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A true warrior's medal, given to those who fought before the battle even started.
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| Grug
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This cute little guy was once the scourge of humanity in another time and place. Now he's content to ride on your head and keep the sun off.
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External Links
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