Meet the Sandvich
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|Meet the Sandvich|
|Erschienen:||October 10, 2008|
"Das Sandvich stellt sich vor" Video Transcript
|[Zwei Stücke des Sandvich können in einem Kühlschrank auf einem Teller neben Red Shed Bier gesehen werden]
[Der "Meet the Sandvich" Text erscheint]
[Die 2 Sandviches werden gezeigt]
Heavy: [Stöhnt schmerzerfüllt]
Scout: "Yeah, there he is!"
Soldier: "You! Stop right where you are, that is an order! He's getting away! Do not let him get to the re-"
[Der Heavy öffnet die Kühlschranktür, und nimmt sich eins der Sandviches]
Scout: "D-don't do it, pal!"
Soldier: "Do. Not. Do it!"
Heavy: [Isst das Sandvich] "Om nom nom nom..."
Soldier: "Oohhhhhhh, hell..."
Scout: "H-h-hey, let's just calm down here! You listening? J-j-just... OH GOD!"
[Der Heavy kichert, und seine Fußschritte werden lauter]
Scout: "OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, OH MY GO-"
[Laute Kampfgeräusche sind hörbar, die Tür bewegt sich einen Spalt auf, eine Bierflasche fällt.]
[Man hört eine Flüssigkeit fließen, wohl das Blut des Scouts.]
Scout: "My blood! H-he punched out all my blood!"
Soldier: "Ow, ow ow ow ow! Ouch, ouch! Ahhh..."
[A thud and a snap is heard]
Soldier: "You call that breaking my spine? You RED team ladies wouldn't know how to break a spine if-"
[A loud snap is heard and the door closes and opens again, the floor now covered with blood and another one of the bottles of beer falls over]
Soldier: "AUGHHH! MY SPINE!"
[A girlish scream is heard as ending flourish music plays. The camera pans across a diagram of the Sandvich]
[Cut to the Heavy in Dustbowl, as he was in the original Meet the Heavy, but instead of wielding his Minigun he is devouring a Sandvich]
Heavy: "Nom nom nom... [Takes a bite] nom nom... mmmm.. nom."
- The video came with a description of the Sandvich, much like the other Meet the Team videos:
- Name: Sandvich
- Role: Edible Device
- Weapons: Toothpick
- Description: He was a good lunch who played by the rules, until the rules robbed him of everything he ever loved. Now he's lettuce, tomato, cheese, bread, and a mysterious slice of meat, marching down your throat and straight to hell. He'll satisfy your hunger. FOR REVENGE!
- On the opening screen, at the bottom it says "Copyright OMNOMNOM", a reference to internet phrase 'OM NOM NOM', an onomatopoeic representation of the act of eating. (In every other Meet the Team video, the copyright is "Copyright LOLOLOL")
- A number of unused lines were recorded for the Meet the Sandvich:
- "What was that, Sandvich? Kill them all? Hahahahaha, good idea!" (This line was eventually used in a slightly modified form as a response upon eating a Sandvich in-game.)
- "Gimme back my legbone! *Smacking noise* Hey! *Smacking noises* Hey! Don't hit me with it!"
- "H-He's like a bear! He's like a big shaved bear that hates people!"
- "Pain! Pain! Pain! Pain! Pain! Pain! Pain!"
- "I regret everything! I regret everything I've ever done!"
- "He's already dead! He's already deaaad!" (Reference to an episode of The Simpsons)
- "Hambone, we have got you by the short and friskies!"
- "Do not do it! Do not even think about doing it! Do not even think about not doing it!"
- "Son, you are writing checks your butt will find uncashable! Are you hearing me? Your backside will be escorted from the bank! You will find this humiliating!"
- "Don't throw your life away, son. You only get one! Or, depending on your religious affiliation, several! Either way it is a finite number so think it through!"
- "You call that killing me? I am not dead! *Cracking noise* Now I am ordering you to kill me! Please please please, God, Kill me!"
- "There is a checkbook in the left-rear pocket of my fatigues! I will pay you all of my money to stop!"
- "Son, I need a blood transfusion double-time! I am going to require roughly half of your blood!"
- "You cannot hurt me, I do not have time to bleed! *Cracking noise* My schedule has just opened up! Aaaohhww, my God!" (Improvised from Predator)
- "You do not frighten me! Pain does not hurt! *Cracking noise* I stand corrected! Arrrrggghhgh!" (Improvised from Road House)
- When Heavy eats the Sandvich at the end of the video, he appears to be standing in the same place as the Meet the Heavy video, where he fires his Minigun.
- The "Sandvich Edible Device" blueprint advertises a health restoration of 120 HP, whereas in the game, it can restore up to 300 HP as a result of balance-related patches.